this one's going to be hard.
i had a job interview last week, and over the weekend i debated with myself why i might or might not get it. as i found out today, i didn't get it. i'm not upset. i have experience, but not with children that young, and i have no formal training. my experience comes from accidentally falling into it, like i was the only option left.
some days i wonder if i've picked the wrong career to get into.
it's hard to stomach that it'll take years for a book of mine to be published, especially for my family because i think they think i'm ruining my life by picking writing straight out of university. i don't want to upset them.
but this is what i want to do. i hope they can accept that.
so, while i work on my YA novel writing and talk to wonderful authors and agents and editors online and soak up all the info and tips they give out, i'll write more short stories to send out to magazines, and i'll write book reviews.
maybe i'll look into getting more recognition for Canadian writers and those who want to be writers. do you know how many literary agents there are in Canada?? according to The Writer's Union of Canada website (link here), approximately 30.
30. that's shocking. if i had contacts in publishing and personally knew other agents, i'd become an agent.
maybe i'll become an advocate for books in print. i understand why e-books exist, i have e-books that i've bought and read and enjoyed, but my first love will always be books in paper form.
maybe i'll offer editing services. my English degree must count for something.
or maybe i'll forget all about this tomorrow and huddle under the covers and cry because i'll think i'm wasting my life.
if you see me blog tomorrow, you'll know i made it out of bed and found some tissues.
i was right, this was hard.
but it had to be said. i have to be honest with myself.